Have you ever noticed how quickly a small comment can turn into a big, emotional moment?
A sigh.
A tone.
A simple request.
A short reply.
Suddenly someone feels attacked, rejected, or completely misunderstood.
When Emotions Hit Fast and Hard
Many people with ADHD experience emotions intensely. Feelings arrive quickly and strongly, especially when there’s a history of criticism, misunderstanding, or conflict.
In those moments, the body reacts before the mind can explain what’s happening. What looks like “overreacting” is often a nervous system trying to protect itself.
Emotional Intensity Is Not the Same as Overreaction
For many ADHD clients, emotional responses are fast, deep, and embodied. Add in a history of criticism or relational rupture, and even small moments can feel like identity threats.
This is where Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria often enters the room — quietly, but with enormous impact.
A neutral comment lands as rejection. A request feels like condemnation. The nervous system reacts before language catches up.
The Roles We Fall Into Under Stress
In conflict, couples often slip into familiar roles:
- One person feels hurt or overwhelmed
- The other feels frustrated or unheard
- Someone tries to fix things so it can all stop
These roles can switch quickly. No one plans them. They just happen when things feel unsafe.
The problem isn’t the emotion — it’s that no one feels seen.
Pausing Instead of Pushing Through
Some of the most helpful moments in relationships happen when someone says:
- “Can we pause for a second?”
- “I think we’re both overwhelmed right now.”
- “I need reassurance before we solve this.”
When emotions settle, understanding becomes possible again.
If you want help to navigate some of these common communication clashes in your relationship, get in touch and I will explain how sessions can support you and your partner understand what's happening and get back on track.